WALKING THE LABYRINTH...

The Revd Deacon Polly M. Bowen

One evening last month, 30 people gathered in Morrell Hall to learn about walking the labyrinth. We borrowed the large canvas labyrinth from St. Paul’s Cathedral and spread it on the floor, and we invited Sr. Sharon Goodremote [1] to come and explain it to us.

Sr. Sharon brought with her some gentle music, prayers, suggestions for prayerful attitudes while walking the labyrinth, and best of all, some diagrams so those who were unable or disinclined to actually walk were able to trace the labyrinth with their fingers as the rest of us walked it.

I chose to walk with an openness to hear what God would say to me. Speak, Lord, your servant is listening. Through all the twists and turns leading sometimes nearer, sometimes farther from the Center, nothing happened. I was not surprised. An extravert, I am ever conscious of my surroundings, and the presence of twenty or so other people on the labyrinth at the same time, while not an annoyance to me, was nevertheless distracting. Most of them were my students, and I had a keen sense of caring deeply for them and wanting them to have a good experience.

When I reached the Center I lingered there, allowing several people to pass me on the journey. Still nothing happened.

This was not my first experience walking the labyrinth; an earlier experience at General Convention had been equally frustrating, but I had attributed that to the unfamiliar location and the hubbub surrounding me at the time. There was none of that here, and I was slightly puzzled by my failure to “connect.”

Finally I started the journey outward toward the end point. I paused now and then to listen for God, but I heard nothing, and continued on. Now I was eager to get to the end. A large group had gathered in Room 110 for refreshments and I wanted join them and hear about their labyrinth experience.

I hurried to Room 110 and listened to a variety of experiences – some good, some neutral, as mine was. I concluded that I am too much of an extravert to lose myself (or more accurately, to lose my consciousness of others) in the experience. One person, who chose not to walk, had taken the diagram to the chapel and reported a profound sense of Oneness with God. I looked forward to trying that.

However, once home and alone in my own familiar prayer-space, I began to reflect on the experience. Of course God didn’t speak to me on the labyrinth walk, just because I had decided that was what would happen. He never dances to my tune! Whenever God gifts me with a profound encounter with the Holy, it is a surprise. God has danced in my heart and in my life, and It has always been at a time of God’s choosing, not mine.

Does this mean I will never walk the labyrinth again? No, not at all. If I didn’t get what I was looking for, perhaps I received much more. I received the insight that God reaches each of us in the way that is best for us. For me, that way may not be a labyrinth. On the other hand, now that my expectations are not so high, God just might choose that vehicle next time. In any case, it is a peaceful way to pray.

I will go on being open to God in all my experiences – trying new things and keeping the old, familiar ways. I don’t have to “search” for God, for I know he is with me whether or not I have some great personal sense of God-consciousness. I can accept new ideas [2] because I know that God is ever present and because I know that he reaches out to us constantly. If I never have a “grand encounter” walking the labyrinth or trying any other kind of worship experience that is new to me, it doesn’t matter. I will try them anyway. And I will always return to the comfortable, contemplative prayer that is the heart of my private worship.

God has gifted me in the past with some profound and penetrating moments, and those times are enough to bring me back and back and back again in prayer. If I experience that extraordinary Oneness again, I will be grateful. But if I must live my life in memory and anticipation of that special time, and never again experience it fully, it is enough. My God lives, and lives in me! It is more than enough.

[1] Sr, Sharon spoke to us about The Rock Environmental Center last spring.

[2] The labyrinth, however, is not a new idea. It has been around for some 5000 years. Christians adopted the labyrinth early-on; one of the most famous labyrinths is in the floor of the Cathedral at Chartres – c. 1200 AD.